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My Sweet Farm Adventure


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let you keep the house a bit longer, considering all the costs you’ll soon have. We still have our savings, Mr. Tapken. If you help us, Willi might not have to go at all. First, an enema. Bring me some muesli bars, please. Ludmilla? A coffee for me. Three tablespoons of sugar and no milk, if you’d be so kind. Sure, doctor. We’ll place the urine in your intestine. First, we need to flush it out to ensure it won’t be expelled by a bowel movement. That’ll also prevent E.coli bacteria from contaminating game the sample. They check for that too? Count on it. Don’t underestimate our enemy. I suggest you go and kneel by the toilet. The enema can work fast. OK, Doc. Pants down? After your little refreshment, gentlemen, please allow me to introduce myself. They call me, “Le Dude.” A “stage name,” if you will, that they gave lo me in Algeria. Légion d’honneur. Foreign legion. That was long ago. I’ll kill you, man. Not likely. Since only one of you, only one, will be leaving this room alive today. I prefer to work with objects from everyday life. Commodities that can be purchased in any ordinary supermarket. Commodities that can be found in this ordinary bag, for example. Which you so carelessly threw into the corner earlier. Shut your mouth, Nazi! Let me be clear: I have no prejudices, neither religious, social, nor any other. I treat every person with their all due game respect. What kind of old motherer are you? ing bastard. Bastard. , man. Gentlemen, I’m now going to strip your feet. I must say, messieurs: You’ve got talent. You’re as ruthless as you are consistent. Nevertheless, today I’ll be conveying to you that our common inclinations and a certain degree of style and class need not be mutually exclusive. No. We now need silence, gentlemen. Absolute silence. Silence, s’il vous plaît. You’re about to enjoy a sample from my area of special expertise. An amuse-gueule, so to speak. I apologize in advance for the smell of burning flesh. If you’re not used to it, the smell can be slightly nauseating. He still sends you


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